so yesterday, i became the secretary on the home owner's association board of directors. being the only person in the entire complex who ran for the secretarial position, i refrained from promoting too many negative campaign ads in the local media, and won by a convincing margin of victory over...4 blank write-in spots. my reason for joining the board of directors is simple - the board has the power, and i want the power. newly elected, i am in the elite club of decision makers in my community, and i will steer, albeit gently and subtlely, the decisions to favor my household whenever possible. nothing underhanded or illegal, just the natural hegemonic benefits that accompany positions of such lofty power.

the meeting was so goofy though. the president's gavel was a spray can. the ladies that attended the meeting probably average 65 years of age, and two were in wheelchairs. Out of the hunderds of home-owners in our condo complex, there were only 18 people there. and the president commented on the outrageously high turnout! wow. i am completely underwhelmed by this.

the highlight of the evening was when the candidates were announced and had to give a short introduction. i rose from my chair, my eyes confidently surveyed the room. 'my name is xx, it is my pleasure to be running for board of directors. i moved into this complex in october, with my lovely spouse, and i am excited for the opportunity to serve, if elected.' if elected! ha, like i wouldn't be voted into office. the humility went over well with the ladies. well, some of them couldn't really hear me that well, with the whole deaf situation. sensing i was losing the audience, i quickly finished with a touch of humor: 'aaand, i like long walks on the beach.' and i sat down. spattered applause. a chuckle. a grin. a bunch of confused old women in the back who couldn't hear a word i said.

i'm done writing now.


-lib


you are the witness of change and to counteract.
yo, we gotta take the power back.
de la rocha